Wednesday, April 18, 2007

These are a Few of my Favorite Words

Spork. I don't know why but the work "spork" just cracks me up. It's so funny I had to buy a titanium spork just to be able to use it in a sentence regularly. For those of you that don't already know, a spork is a combination spoon and fork, typically made of plastic and distributed with the worst sort of fast food, such as a Mashed Potato Bowl from Kentucky Fried Chicken.

But after considering the spork, I wondered why it wasn't called a foon, which is pretty danged funny as well. Perhaps because of it's proximity to the word "buffoon" which I always think of as a nude clown. And if you have foons, why not spives, fives, knorks, or knoons?

Why stop at silverware? I'll bet there's a substantial cost savings for KFC to dish up it's carbo-lardo meals on spowls or borks, which would be a combination bowl and fork or bowl and spoon. How about that? No plastic silverware to distribute at all!

Now I should probably be patenting this idea, but how about a borkin? that's right, a combination bowl and fork that you can wipe your mouth with after you finish eating out of/with it. Awesome huh?

I'm gonna go celebrate with a borkin full of mashed potatoes, gravy, bacon, corn, cheese, and refried beans!

4 comments:

Sour Grapes said...

Only a seriously rich guy could afford to give away such bitchin ideas for free. Maybe I should call them frideas! Thank God it's Frideas!

Paula said...

Frilliant!

Unknown said...

So smuckin' fart! That's some funny shit but that combo you're gonna eat'll give ya hot gas. Just a warning to not leave home, ok?

Anonymous said...

Well written article.